8.14.2010

Alvena Sky

"Alvena Sky"
Acrylic on canvas, 14" x 18"



Well, what better place to start then with my very first canvas. Here is the story:

It was our first year together in our tiny house nestled in the boonies of rural Saskatchewan.  A 45min commute to work, in a community of retirees who mostly kept to themselves (aside from the agitated biker after a slight misunderstanding, but that's another story). 
It was a tough year for us; a lonely year as we were trying to figure out the dynamics of marriage, reconnect with family, and make friends in a new community, finding our place in what was supposed to be our home.  The start of our new life together.

Debt was high, income was unstable...our anxiety grew, planting seed to new insecurities.  Connections were weakened as we struggled to express ourselves openly to our friends and family.  The door was opened to misunderstanding when we tried to find comfort in relationship.  Received pity over empathy, judgment in place of trust, shame where we hoped to find understanding.  We were confused and uncertain.  We were drowning...treading water, desperate to pull our heads out of the current, we clung to the faith filled promises found in the words of the New Testament.

We often found ourselves stranded, unable to put gas in the car...yet needing an escape as the weight of failure closed in on us--the invasive phone calls, empty fridge, and looming uncertainty.  We needed to shut the door to our mess, and feel safe.

Sanctuary, for me, was quickly found in the beauty revealed through the rolling Saskatchewan skies.  Sitting on the front porch of our little old house, in the stillness of the night we found a place of freedom.  A beautiful canvas before me, removing me from the current circumstances, the skies drew me into the bigger picture.  My breath of fresh air at days end, my strength and hope.

It was through the storm clouds on the horizon that God revealed his power to me....  Our life was out of control, but God held our future in his hands.  In watching the ominous storm clouds above our meager existence, I was given a glimpse into how splendid, creative, tender, yet precise our Creator is--to place me in the middle of nowhere, an insignificant being amidst a world of beautiful pictures, yet so loved and completely significant to know that I am here with purpose!
This was the peace my heart craved, and a peace I crave yet again as I grow arrogant in my own dominion....  The less control I cling to, the greater portion someone else holds, but misplaced trust leaves us bruised if left in the imperfect hands of self.  But God has set a reminder before me that I cannot ignore...as long as I take the time to look up.  My future belongs to him.  As the creator of my dreams, he has the power to make them beautiful.

4 comments:

Rachel said...

Your writing and you art has touched me. That picture should not represent peace. Those who don't know God definitely won't get it and I struggle daily to remember it.

Mel said...

oh joy...once again your beautiful words have reminded me of how big our God is. Thank you.

Mel

Andrea said...

Joy this moved me to tears. I feel that I have learnt so much more about you just by reading this blog. I Love all your art work, it's not just a picture, but a glimpse into your soul.

Trudy said...

breath-taking. Powerful, strong and amazing. Thanks for sharing your work and the stories behind it. I really relate to piece, that feeling of lost yet finding peace and safety with God. you are so talented.
Trudy :)